Saturday, December 20, 2008

I have an idea for a movie

It's called Nurse Practitioner. It's about a mild-mannered RN in her mid to late twenties who's also a highly skilled assassin. She's been able to balance her two professional lives exceptionally well for some time — 12-hour shifts in the hospital three days a week, with another three dedicated to clandestine murder. She drives gun metal-colored Volkswagen GTI. She has lots of issues with mortality.

On her one day off, she visits her mostly senile father in a nursing home. He is a legendary assassin whose sickening dedication to his craft destroyed both his family and his mental lucidity. The Nurse constantly worries that she is going to end up like him.


A charming but suspiciously inquisitive English gentleman unexpectedly shows up in her rotation due to an irregular heartbeat. He gradually reveals intimate details about The Nurse's life. She soon realizes that he is not there for an irregular heartbeat after all! He is there to settle a long-standing score between his father, or maybe his brother, and The Nurse's father. (I'm still working this part out.) There will be a lot of ethnic henchmen, though.


Lots and lots of fighting ensues, both in and out of the hospital. IV drip stands as swords! Respirator tubes as garrote wire! Syringes as syringes filled with poison!


Think of the costume possibilities.


Score by Hot Chip.
Or maybe Massive Attack.

There will be one subtle in-joke about Daryl Hannah's nurse character in
Kill Bill.

CAST

Jessica Biel ... The Nurse

Gary Oldman ... The Nurse's Father

Mary-Louise Parker ... The Nurse's Dead (OR IS SHE?) Mother (mostly flashbacks)

Christopher Eccleston ... Charming But Suspiciously Inquisitive English Guy/Villain

Diego Luna ... The Nurse's Love Interest, Who is in a Dance-Punk Band But Works in the Hospital's Laundry Room to Make Ends Meet

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Manny splendored

First this (via NYT):



Then this (Jeepney — got the limited black! — via URB):



RELATED: Brought to you by San Miguel

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Richard Blais in Philly




I had the opportunity to eat a meal cooked by Atlanta-based chef Richard Blais, who you may know as one of the finalists on Top Chef: Chicago. Check out the recap on Meal Ticket.

Photos by Felicia D'Ambrosio.

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Election Day 2008





Follow City Paper's election coverage on The Clog, Flickr and Twitter.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

On Broad Street



Originally posted here.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Ong Bak 2 trailer



Holy fish hook at 1:42!

(Via Cinematical)

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Cole Hamels.


When he is "on," he works quickly, putting his glove hand up in front of his face, taking his signal from the catcher and methodically repeating the same motion he's been using since Little League. It's something analysts love about him: "Hitters feed off changes they make you make," explains former Phillies pitcher and current postgame analyst Mitch Williams enviously. "That is what he does an exceptional job of: He doesn't show anything." This may sound straightforward, but remaining focused under the pressure of pitching is no easy task. Williams was nicknamed "Wild Thing" for his infamous inability to do so himself.

Killer.


Read the rest of E. James Beale's profile of Hamels here.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Meal Ticket, City Paper's new food and drink blog


City Paper just launched a new food and drink blog. It's called Meal Ticket. It's written by CP's Felicia D'Ambrosio and myself. It is the most dashing and handsome food blog around and it is the reason I haven't been able to update the TJ as of late.

Meal Ticket features lots and lots of content — paeans to hyper-regional sandwiches, new menus, inside looks at bodaciously adorned Mad Men-esque chophouses and straight-up food nerd ducats like me attending a community meeting to scratch down Tria 3 details.

I'll buy you a beer if you go read. Or how about you go read first and I'll buy you a beer this weekend or something?


citypaper.net/mealticket

Monday, October 06, 2008

The most intriguing House synopsis I've ever read

Repeat, "Paternity", (2004), A 16-year-old boy has night terrors after getting hit on the head by a lacrosse ball, and House (Hugh Laurie) immediately suspects he's a victim of sexual abuse. Later, he changes the diagnosis to MS. (Drama).

I'm watching the episode and the MS lacrosse player sexual abuse victim just jumped off the roof! Poor kid.

Does anyone else find themselves watching House reruns multiple times throughout the week?

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Time to make the beer



I (kinda) helped make beer at the brand-new Yards Brewing Co. Check it out here.

Sunday, September 07, 2008

FLACCO!



[Carson] Palmer was outplayed by Ravens rookie Joe Flacco, forced into the starting role because of a season-ending shoulder injury to Kyle Boller and Troy Smith's infected tonsils. Flacco ran for a 38-yard touchdown to put Baltimore up 17-3 in the third quarter and deftly operated within the careful attack deployed by Harbaugh and new offensive coordinator Cam Cameron.

Flaccoflacco
flaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflacco
flaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflaccoflacco

Monday, September 01, 2008

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

No sleep 'til Portland

Taking a cue from Adam Riff:



Hasta luego, folks.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

No bueno



The terrible wine label proofreading.

The basketball team.

Vicky Cristina Barcelona.

Let's bomb Spain!

Excuses, excuses, excuses



I haven't updated in a minute because a) I got a Mac and I've been adjusting to the weirdness; b) I'm in holy-shit-week-before-vacation freakout mode; c) I've been writing a few things:

- Review of Pineapple Express

- One-Track Mind on Ratatat's "Falcon Jab" (Thanks to Tsikitas for the suggestion)

- Review of Tropic Thunder

Saturday, July 26, 2008

For the Record





I picked up this guy from Via Bicycles last month after selling my so-wrong-for-the-city Mongoose Switchback on Craigslist.

It's a pretty old vintage Raleigh Record converted to single speed (not fixie). It's not particularly fancy or light or warp-speed, but it runs like a Swiss clock. My daily commute is now fun and efficient instead of annoying and excruciating.

My coworker Isaiah claims that I am insane for getting the gears taken off, but they looked kinda busted at the time of purchase and I didn't want to deal with constantly maintaining them. I don't ever really use gears anyway. Philly's pretty flat.

The folks at Via are truly the best around. Wouldn't buy bike stuff anywhere else.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Sunday, July 20, 2008

ChaCha > steam engine




The other day, my co-worker
Molly Eichel asked text Q&A service ChaCha a very important question:

Question: "Drew Lazor: Cool or not?"

Their response:

Answer: "Drew Lazor, of the Philadelphia City Paper, is a well rounded food/restaurant critic who seems to know his business well, so cool."

ChaCha: More important than Darwin and Lincoln combined.

Friday, July 18, 2008

The Distrito sleeps alone tonight



Yesterday, I toured Distrito, the new Jose Garces restaurant at 3945 Chestnut.

Details here and here.

Original post (with more details)
here.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Feist's appearance on Sesame Street makes me want to ...



A. Call my mother

B. Become a better listener


C. Have children, or at least become a mentor


D.
Sing with a mixture of wisdom and exuberance that's all my own

E. Have sex with Feist

Friday, July 11, 2008

In-tent-city at Omoi



When they're not posting style profiles of my friend Larry, the girls over at Omoi are holding amazing weekend tent sales.

I made out like a bandit after work today. Just a few of the things I picked up. I passed on the sick WeSC windbreaker awhile back because it was too pricey; today it was marked down by 40 percent. (Goes with this blog's color scheme, no?) Tee was $10. Kitty print wasn't on sale, but reasonably priced nonetheless. (Bought it for Michelle because it looks like Cleo.)

CP fashion platelet Monica Weymouth has all the info on the sale, which runs through July 13, here and here.

Monday, July 07, 2008

The gayest 24 hours of my life



Last night, I watched and reviewed four movies for the Philadelphia International Gay and Lesbian Film Festival. Subject matter included a tale of forbidden love between a Thai assassin and his captive police informant and the relationship between a (gay?) cannibal and the man he ate alive.


This morning, a coworker came into my office to ask me if I wanted to raffle Jesse McCartney concert tickets off on our blog.


This evening, I went to a screening of Mamma Mia! with my friends Matt and Fran. Matt was interviewed for a Wired 96.5 segment called "Gaywalking," a stupid play on Leno's "Jaywalking" where they ask gay dudes stereotypically "straight" trivia (ex: "At what fictional college does
Animal House take place?").

Tonight, I was able to pick out Candice Bergen's voice during a Family Guy rerun.

The night is still young.

Saturday, July 05, 2008

I Met The Walrus



The full version of Jerry Levitan's Oscar-nominated short is now on YouTube.

Thursday, July 03, 2008

He Is Legend



Check out A.D. Amorosi's piece on John Legend — just in time for his July 4 performance in Philly — in this week's City Paper. You can stream his new single, too.

All photos by Michael T. Regan.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

TOP THIS YOUTUBE COMMENT



I don't think you can.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Annihilate This Week = not annihilated



For some reason, I thought my friend TR's blog was dead. I don't remember taking it off my blogroll, but apparently I did. It's definitely not dead. Proof: Here is a link to his blog and here is a picture of Shelly and him yelling at the guy from Paint It Black.

Sorry about that, dude.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

[obligatory "_____ SMASH!" headline]





I wrote about
The Incredible Hulk in this week's City Paper. Read it here.

Monday, June 09, 2008

Ryan Beck, here and there: 50 days



My friend Ryan Beck's show, here and there: 50 days, will be up at Northern Liberties' 222gallery (222 Vine St.) through July 28. Here are a few shots from the June 6 opening reception.

This is Ryan's refreshingly frank artist bio:

Ryan Beck obtained his BA in Painting from Tyler School of Art, Temple University, and has exhibited in various galleries in Philadelphia, Los Angeles, and New York City. Ryan lives and works in Philadelphia and is currently couch surfing at the Compound, where his studio is outside of Chinatown. When he is not painting, he is looking up movie memorabilia on eBay that he'll never buy, skateboarding, or trying to convince people why they should watch the movie Blue Velvet. This is his first Philadelphia solo show.

Friday, May 30, 2008

Swing low



Thoughts coming maybe?

Nah.

God bless Lostpedia.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Cool Kids for self-titled



I profiled Chicago's Cool Kids for the debut issue of self-titled, the new digital/print hybrid hotness from the mensches behind the dearly departed DIW.

More about the mag
here. Go here to check out some reading tips for the inaugural digital edition.

Cool Kids on MySpace.

Related:
Now take my picture

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Things you never expect your girlfriend to say



"It's on the soundtrack to
Crooklyn, if that helps." - Michelle, helping me find the song "O-o-h Child" by The Five Stairsteps on iTunes

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Things I Did Not Know: Horse Racing Analysis Edition



There is an ESPN horse racing analyst named Randy Moss.

Saturday, May 03, 2008

Yuri Shibuya for Theme



[Photos: yurishibuya.com]

Theme just posted my Q&A with Yuri Shibuya.

Yuri is a noted commercial and skate photographer in Japan, but she's most passionate about travel: Several times a year, she takes off on trips all over the world, documenting who and what she comes across with her camera.
The trips themselves seem very spontaneous; how much planning is involved?

I do research on what time of year to go and costs, then I make a plan. Different reasons for different destinations. Like Jamaica and Cuba — I love the music from there, and I wanted to see where that music was coming from. I like seeing different cultures and lifestyles, which keep changing and fading away. I want to take pictures and document it all before it’s gone. Someday we might never see hand-painted signs or kids playing in the street anymore.
Related: Hamburger Eyes for Theme

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Sicker than the leading brand

I've never seen "2 Girls 1 Cup," but I'm guessing that watching it is comparable to the entrail-knotting visceral reaction I experience when faced with any of the following:













Related: Things that will haunt me for the rest of my life

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Picture me rollin'



My sister took this picture of The Pope.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Jimmy meet world


[click to enlarge]

This is a picture of Jimmy "Jimmy the Gent" Burke, the inspiration for De Niro's character in Goodfellas, getting arrested in 1980. I don't know if it's the coloring or the clearly-'80s Adidas T or the triumphant mustaches on those G-Men, but I think it's brilliant.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Easy, Street


Illustration: Evan Lopez

This past February,
City Paper's news section kicked off its "Professor Street Says" column, which features actual excerpts from the urban politics class former Philadelphia mayor John Street teaches at Temple University (overview here).

Temple was on spring break last week, so this image ran in lieu of a Street quote. I felt it was my duty — as a CP staffer, yes, but mostly as a Philadelphian — to share it.

Friday, March 21, 2008

I see how it is, CBSSports.com.




Texas A&M won. Great! I had them.



Then why...?



Aggies forward Josh Carter is of the opinion that Mormon trickery's afoot!

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Daywaltzer



"So I'm not trying to be overconfident here, but I feel really, really good about our choreography."


"Oh, totally. Couldn't agree more. The spins are getting tighter and tighter every day."


"Exactly. So what we need now is a theme."


"I was afraid you were going to say that. I'm really a drawing a blank here, babe."


"Honey?"


"Yes?"


"Have you ever seen Blade?"

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Hamburger Eyes for Theme





[photo spreads from Hamburger Eyes: Inside Burgerworld; click to enlarge]

The fine folks at
Theme Magazine just put up my profile of the dudes behind Hamburger Eyes, an amazing photo zine out of the Bay Area. My favorite quote from the piece, courtesy of Eyes co-founder Stefan Simikich:
Simikich bristles when recalling one art critic who drew parallels between Eyes and Vice. “Maybe you can compare them because they appeal to the same age group, but that’s basically like saying Def Leppard and black metal are the same,” he says. “They’re not. Other than that they both have guitars.”
Gully.

Read more about the zine
here and then check out some back issue highlights. They just put a book out on powerHouse, which I highly recommend. And I hear they're coming to Philly in the fall to do a show at Space 1026.