Monday, November 26, 2007

Gentleman, start your uppers/Showgirls quips...

She will play Julia Winston -- former wife of Horatio Caine (David Caruso) and the mother of his recently discovered teenage son, Kyle (Evan Ellingson) -- who becomes part of an investigation when her billionaire husband is murdered.

Berkley has guest-starred on the mothership CSI series, CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, which spawned CSI: Miami.

The actress's feature credits include Showgirls, Any Given Sunday, Curse of the Jade Scorpion and Rodger Dodger.

And they're off!

- "The actress best known to twenty-somethings everywhere as Saved By the Bell's brainy, pill-popping, A.C. Slater-lovin' Jessie..."

- "Having already been there and done that in Las Vegas, Elizabeth Berkley is heading south for the winter. The onetime CSI guest star (what, you thought we were referring to Showgirls?) will be joining CSI: Miami next month as a recurring character."

- "Berkley, of course, is best known as Jesse Spano, the feminist who was so excited, but so scared after developing an addiction to caffeine pills in a very special episode of the 80s sitcom Saved By the Bell."

- "As for Berkley, who starred in what's arguably one of the worst movies ever made, The Hollywood Reporter sez she'll play Julia Winston, a woman caught in the middle of a murder investigation when her rich hubby is found dead. I couldn't confirm the rumor that the hubby died of shock after watching Berkley in Showgirls."

- "If you were a fan of Showgirls (or Saved By the Bell) you'll be excited* to hear that Elizabeth Berkley is joining CBS' crime drama CSI: Miami as a recurring character."

* Debatable.

(Thanks Michelle)

Friday, November 23, 2007


This morning, I was roused from my wine-and-cold-stuffing-at-1 a.m. slumber by the cacophonous din of my mother washing dishes and blasting an electro playlist.

My childhood room is now used mostly as a storage space. One of the things my parents chose to put up there was a CD tower that houses but a fraction of the Christmas albums they own:

It's worth noting that my last name is Sharpied on several of the jewel cases to deter thievery at Filipino Christmas functions. Filipino people : American Christmas pop :: French people : Jerry Lewis.

Yes, that is the 98° holiday record.

In case you were wondering why my "Recently Listened" queue currently looks like this:

It's because I also found my old copy of the My So-Called Life soundtrack in the same tower.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Caffeine Rush

Pardon the pimping, but if you're coffee-inclined, check this week's City Paper for my story on Saxbys, a locally based chain that looks to rival Starbucks on national level. But of course, they've gotta set up shop in Philly first...

(Amazing illustration by Ryan Casey)

Monday, November 12, 2007

Monday, November 05, 2007


11:46 p.m. You know a game is over when Mike Tirico resorts to making recycling jokes.

11:51 p.m. I sift through the day's mail and tear open a junk envelope emblazoned with a logo that reads "You've Been Drafted!" Opening lines of the form letter:

Hey Andrew P. Lazor,

Imagine walking onto the field at Heinz Field as the Pittsburgh Steelers go through their game day warm-ups. That's just one of the exciting experiences you can earn with the new Pittsburgh Steelers Extra Points Platinum Plus credit card.


[06nov07] 2:45 p.m. Ahem.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

"Weak and ineffectual"

Earlier today, my dad — a lifelong Patriots fan who was born and bred in Connecticut — drew a parallel between Peyton Manning and Caspar Milquetoast.

My dad is a lifelong Patriots fan who was born and bred in Connecticut.