Saturday, May 06, 2006

Back like Revenge of the Nerds


Long-term Tatooine recon mission a success;
Boba Fett's identity revealed


College is officially in the books. I hope I did well on my finals and all, but to be real, I'm much more focused on moving on. People always get wistful and sentimentally rhapsodic (sometimes to an irritating extreme) when it comes time to turn the tassel, but I'd be lying if I said I picture myself wishing I still had turnitin.com bookmarked on my computer a year from today. It's all over (cue rhythmic ACC clapping), and I'm currently staring down the barrel of what guidance counselors and casual acquaintances refer to as "reality." But for me, this reality has been, uh, realistic for a few years. During my tenure, I made it a point to get as much outside-the-classroom experience as possible, knowing that in the long run, it was much more valuable than how many academic clubs I belonged to or how many GPA-crushing midterms I successfully toppled. In short, I'm ready. Let's get it.


Okay, enough ivy-laden wallowing. It's now time to turn my attention back to something far more important--
boring entertaining the girlfriend the masses via this bullshit receptable blog. First, fun with the print screen key:



So I slack on updating this shit for nearly a month, and I get 328 visitors in one day? Three hundred twenty eight?! For me, this is the Statcounter equivalent of Kobe's 81. Quick question: who are you people? Feel free to drop a comment and say hello. I'd love to figure just who was unlucky enough to stumble upon this shitshow.



Completely necessary, in my opinion.

I'm still not quite sure how
this became this, but it's certainly exciting. Shoutout to Jon Caroulis.

I've been doing a bunch for the
City Paper recently. I decided to throw some links up here, not because I think I'm cool, but because I'm OCD with my browser bookmarks and really want to delete all this shit outta there. This way, I still have easy access, and my OCD abides. Problem solving/reinforcing at its best.

For Those About to Rock (rock-paper-scissors tourney)
Gay To Play (Equality Forum)
Watering Hole: T. Hogan's (drunk white people)
Food For Thought (animals and morals and blabla)
To The Attack Pod! (heart failure simulator)
Watering Hole: A Bar Named Sue (drunk white people again, except this time it's just Michelle and I)

Deadspin has become a check-it-multiple-times-a-day kinda blog for me. I know that I'm really behind the times with this, but that's just because I'm perpetually six to seven steps behind the entire Internet this kinda stuff. Anyway, it's excellent, but you already knew that. With gems like this and this, you'd be hard-pressed to argue that it's not the best sports blog out there. Game over.

Thanks to Duane for throwing up some links to my stories over at Secret Dead Blog. Dude, I'll give you $20-$30 if you pen me into your next crime novel. I'm more than willing to die in an extremely scatological, nothing-to-do-with-the-plot-but-still-cool-cuz-it's-bloodyasfuck kinda way. Quick suggestion: make my character less like lame me and more like Matthew Modine in either Full Metal Jacket or Cutthroat Island. Gracias.

Also want to say thanks to my dude Jesse for sending me the crazy Firefox graphic seen to your right (that is, if you're using FF; if you're in IE, it's probably somewhere towards the bottom of the page/banished somewhere deep within the bowels of my little sister's Flickr account). If anyone knows who created this image, please let me know so I can give links/credit.

Now, notes on some new Champions of Literacy:


- I get the impression that
Empires Fall has something to do with politics.

-
Drew, Lou, McG, P-Ho and a slew of other characters are the stats-obsessed masterminds behind Insurance Runs. I'm on the roster (ughhh), but I don't think I'll be posting all that much--I don't know Bo Jackson about baseball, despite the fact that I occasionally cover high school games for the Local. I did, however, come up with the name--I was originally lobbying for something Sabo-related, but it didn't pan out.

-
Sara is a nice girl, so I can forgive her for being a total theater nerd entitling one of her posts "My Tractor's Sexy." Just don't do it again, or I'll cut you. With a knife.

-
MoMac (can I call you that?) is another nice girl. She knows what she's doing, so don't try to put one past her. Jerks.

- The dude Heath moved his shit from the sordid depths of Blogger to some
brand-new shit. Look for OfTheWasteland.com to take off real soon.

Finally, what better way to wrap up this non-narrative mess than
this? I'll see y'all soon. Don't forget to write.

6 comments:

geoff p said...

great stie - followed a link from another blog and landed here. well worth the visit.
geoff p

Sara said...

Theatre geeks would have gotten the title. It's a play off that shit-ass country song. In theatre, a "tractor" is a techie/actor. Ta da! Yeah I'm a theatre nerd, and I love it. Thanks for the linkage!

Paul Tsikitas said...

Yo man. Like, good post and all, but I was listening to Primus' "Fisticuffs" when I watched the Lady Punch video... I almost pissed myself at the way the sun moon earth and your blog aligned for sweetest perfection.

Duane Swierczynski said...

$30? Sold, dude. You will officially die an extremely grisly death in the next book.

Ah, hell. Don't even bother with the cash. I'll kill you for free.

Drew said...

Geoff: Thanks. I'm kinda obsessed with the fact that your website link is the Guinea Pig Association.

Sara: A tractor is a techie/actor? Holy shit.

Tsik: Sun, moon, earth, Trapper Juan. It's an obvious progression. I actually think that was an PSAT question back in the day.

Duane: Icepick? No, too obvious. Bowling pin, maybe?

Trebuchet said...

I've been saving this up for someday when I have a character to kill, but I guess I'll just share it here (in recognition of the fact that I'm unlikely to EVER have a character to kill outside of real life):

Put him in the oven, lock it, and turn it on self-clean.

Isn't that just completely depraved? I know. I love it.