Thursday, January 26, 2006

Everything is easy, baby

I have nothing particularly interesting to say. I'd like to believe that this happens only once in awhile, but the truth is that I pretty much live in a perpetual state of, uh, non-interestingness (case in point: I can't think of what word should go there). In the spirit of my inability to keep anyone's attention, I'm just going to lazily bombard all one of you with links. Enjoy.

CP shit: Ben's ghost, bathroom graffiti and Quizzo Bowl.

From Philebrity: Bar gets shuts down for owing the city $44 in taxes. The city is wack. They sent us a $600 gas bill because they combined the balance for my house with the charges for my friend's apartment (the bill is somehow still in her name from back when we lived together). The eff?

Picked up this book at the store the other day. Haven't started it yet, but Michelle seems to like it.

The Onion has been absolutely stellar in 2006. I can only hope to someday have two percent of the ability that these dudes possess. Some favorites here, here and here. Ooh, and this.

Liz challenged me to chronicle five bizarre idiosyncracies that I have and write about them, like she did awhile back. Quick background: Liz is the only person in the Pacific Northwest with whom I've ever communicated, suggesting (maybe conclusively) that it is in fact a real place. I've heard rumors of the Supersonics being actual people, and not just actors, but I was all like "For the love of Sebastian Telfair, I'm not that naive." I also heard that Irene from RW Seattle was just Rockwell in whiteface. Questionable evidence notwithstanding, Liz seems to be the real deal, unless she's just another cog in the machine of Left Coast deception. I don't trust you guys.

Rick Moranis released an alt-country album. I hear you can stream it off his website. The world will most definitely end tomorrow.

OKP review: Stiffed.

High school basketball shit (for my own lonely reference, don't bother clicking).

Saigon gets stabbed in the temple, takes a cab to the hospital because he doesn't want to get blood in his car. I love this guy.

Inquirer piece about Gary Neal. I know dude was acquitted of all wrongdoing, but this makes him sound like he's up for sainthood or something. Regardless, dude is fifth highest scorer in the nation.

Nastack hit us with this amazingness the other day. It's obviously P-Shopped, but that's okay.

Good piece on how excellent Public League players aren't going to UPenn (I wonder why...), but still shine in the Big 5.

I should eat a dick because I didn't like an album that much. I'll take mine medium rare. Puerto Ricans only, please.

I'm thinking about a Collegian piece entitled "You Are Not Bill Simmons." Gonna be about since Sports Guy is so revered, he's given thousands of fratty dullards the impression they can analyze shit on his level, leading to an influx of Blogspots overrun with unfunny attempts to compare Troy Polamalu to Men at Work's Business As Usual. Takes?


kibby said...

Drewwwwwww...PGW sucks. They were my nemesis, but now it's PECO cause my bills are like $400. Bastards, in any case did you get it straightened out? After i talked to other drew i thought about it and thought that might have been the problem. But the thing is, the last several months I've been getting letters from PGW saying that we had overpaid our account and that we owed zero. I bet they realized their mistake and are gonna charge it all to us is one bill. Damn. PGW might be sworn enemy #1 again. In other news, this past weekend I got fake butt-fucked by a black stripper named triple t, aka lord romance, in my living room in front of about 20 girls. More on that later.

P.S. Triple T stands for "Tempted to Touch".... best $150 we ever spent.

Drew said...

Your life's so boring, Kibby. Lord Romance faux-rammed me like two years ago. Get with it.

Trebuchet said...

Dude! Real person. Here. And I don't wear hemp, recycle habitually, comment when the sun comes out, or only drink coffee and listen to grunge.

I do, however, believe anyone who carries an umbrella is a pussy.

emynd said...

First of all, I thought Kibby's message says "face butt-fucked" instead of "fake" and I was like "WTF?!"

Second of all, I recommended that book on my blog way back in the day. Get up on your get ups, dude. It's good, but pretty conservative. Although I'm sure the author would disagree with this, his basic argument is this: "if it weren't for globalization, I would've never discovered soccer... so globalization is good!!" Otherwise, it's really cool to read all the intricacies and idiosyncracies between teams and their fans and rivals and blah and blah and blah. Since I have no emotional attachment to any of the teams, I've literally forgotten pretty much everything I read in that lil' muhfucka, but still, t'was fun. You'll enjoy it.

Writing a blog is hard work. Trying to pretend you're interesting is hard work. I just do it for the money.

I'm rich.


Drew said...

Liz, don't worry, I didn't think you did any of that stereotypical Seattle shit. I just need verification that Seattle actually exists. It's weird, as soon as I posted that shit I got an e-mail from my buddy Ed who is actually living out in Tacoma, running a homeless shelter or something. He produces a newspaper written almost entirely by homeless people. In other words, he is going to heaven no matter what.

E, I don't recall seeing the soccer on your blog; regardless, the book seems intruiging. I'm definitely going to check it, even though it seems rather dense. One thing that struck me as weird was this blurb on the back: "It's as if Nick Hornby...commandeered Tom Friedman's laptop." Whoa backhanded compliment. You would think they would pick a less insulting blurb (not that NH sucks, it just kinda sucks to say that it seems as though he wrote your book).

emynd said...

And yeah, it's not like Tom Friedman is all that great either.

Nick Hornby needs to shut up with his writing-about-music stuff though. Dude doesn't know what the eff he's talking about.


Believe it or not, the word verification is: psajak.

that's right. P. Sajak... Pat Sajak.


Trebuchet said...

Yes, Drew: That paper is called "Real Change". Aaah, Seattle. There may be an East-Coast bias in football and y'all might not know where we are actually located, but Seattle is the city with a soul.

I'm going to go play my harp now...